Sleep? Never Heard of Her

Because apparently my house had other plans last night

Now before we get into the weird shit…

At the end of this blog I’m gonna drop a couple links of personal self-care items I actually use at home—because people have been asking.

The words that are underlined—if you click them—they’ll take you straight to the links.

Alright… now let’s talk about last night.

Just as I’m finally getting ready to fall asleep…

My son comes into my room, full panic mode:

“Mom… something in the fridge is leaking.”

😑

Sir.

The timing. Every. Single. Time.

I swear this kid has some kind of internal alarm that goes off the second I’m about to pass out like—

oh perfect, let’s go wake Mom back up.

So now I’m up.

We go deal with the mystery leaking vitamin situation…

handle it… talk it through… crisis averted.

Cool.

I finally lay back down and actually fall asleep.

Next thing I know it’s 12:30 in the morning…

And I hear this noise.

Like… a random, repetitive what the hell is that noise.

So now I’m walking around the house half asleep trying to figure out where it’s coming from…

Nothing.

Can’t find it anywhere.

So I go into my son’s room… open the door…

And his window is WIDE open.

It’s freezing.

Wind is ripping through the room.

And his bedroom door is literally blowing back and forth making the noise.

🤦‍♀️

Of course it is.

So I shut the window, fix the door, and head back to bed…

And my son?

Didn’t even blink.

Slept through all of it.

Must be nice.

And then…

4:30am.

Because why not.

I have this beautiful tree right outside my window that’s finally starting to bloom…

But now the wind has picked up again…

And the branch is hitting something going:

Ting… ting… ting…

And the birds?

FULL concert mode.

Like we are starting the day whether I agreed to it or not.

And I’m just laying there like…

You’ve got to be kidding me.

I love nature… but what in the actual hell was this night 😂

Alright… so after the longest, most random night ever…

I finally wake up for the day around 6:45am.

And I don’t just jump out of bed.

I start my mornings slow. I take my time.

Well… that lasted about five minutes.

Because all of a sudden I hear this trickling noise.

And immediately I’m like—

oh hell no… the dog?!

Because he had been ringing his bell to go potty…

So now I’m in full panic mode thinking I’ve got a situation on the floor.

Nope.

Just my child… not shutting the bathroom door while handling his morning business.

😑

Cool. Love that for me.

Panic over.

So I move on and start setting up my tripod to get my morning vlog going…

Glow Getter routine, little life update—

what yesterday looked like, what today might look like…

You know… my thing.

And you know what’s kind of wild… just showing up as yourself and people are actually noticing.

Like… I wasn’t expecting all of this to happen so fast… but I’m here for it.

And then… squirrel brain kicks in.

I’m like—oh shit, I have a package.

So I run down to the package room, grab it…

It’s my new lights for my videos.

Perfect.

Except…

I don’t read directions.

At all.

So now I’m putting this thing together completely ass backwards…

making it way harder than it needs to be…

When realistically… if I would’ve just opened the little pamphlet and glanced at it for two seconds…

We would’ve been done.

But no.

This is Lynette we’re talking about.

So why would we do that the easy way?

I finally get my vlog done… look at the clock…

Oh shit.

I gotta get my ass out the door.

But I still need to grab my protein coffee with my glow mushrooms.

So in my head I’m like—okay, I’m leaving at 8:55.

Reality?

I walk out the door at 9:05.

Classic.

But listen…

I was prepared.

I had four clients today.

And I got my non-negotiable routine in.

That’s what sets the tone. Every time.

Because yesterday was insane…

last night was… whatever the hell that was…

But today?

All four clients were so peaceful.

Like… unusually peaceful.

I couldn’t even believe it.

Only weird parts?

I damn near spilled my entire bottle of frankincense.

😳

And my diffuser just… quit.

Like fully done.

Cool cool cool.

(Adding “order new diffuser” to the never-ending list.)

Got my laundry done.

Got the office cleaned up.

Came home…

And I’m like—I’m hungry.

So I ate some veggie fries and decided I needed a bowl of ramen.

And since I have nothing planned for tonight…

Why not just sit down and get today’s blog done.

Lucky for me… I get to just chill.

No plans.

So I’m just gonna lay here and watch.

And honestly…

After a night like that and a day like this…

I’m not mad about it.

Before I go:

Here are today’s two star items:

• My acupressure mat + pillow

This thing… hurts so good 😂 but in the best way. I lay on it at night or when my body feels tight and it helps release everything.

• My neck traction / stretch device

Game changer. Especially if you hold tension in your neck like most of us do. I use this to decompress after long days and you can literally feel the difference.

If your nervous system needs a place to exhale, I offer trauma-informed massage, head spa treatments, and advanced skincare at 888 Spa MN—where real life and real healing meet.