The Day I Realized I’m the Sovereign Queen of My Own Life

The day started the way most of my days start now.

My glow routine.

My peptides.

My weekly NAD injection.

Some people call it biohacking. I just call it supporting a body that spent a lot of years running in survival mode.

These days I focus on rebuilding my energy, taking care of myself, and giving my body the support it didn’t get during the years when survival was the only goal.

Everyone’s body is different, and what works for me may not work for someone else — but learning to prioritize my own health has finally become part of this new chapter of my life.

If I’m going to be the main character in my own story, my cells might as well keep up with my spirit.

Lash Lift Day

After my morning routine, I headed to Snips Salon in Bloomington to see Shelby.

Today’s lineup:

Lash lift

Brow tint

Brow wax

The trifecta.

Shelby finished up and handed me the mirror so I could check everything.

Brows looked great.

Lashes looked lifted and awake.

Mission accomplished.

I thanked her, paid, and headed out the door.

But the moment that actually hit me didn’t happen in the salon.

It happened on the drive home.

At a stoplight I caught my reflection in the rearview mirror and thought,

Damn… I look good.

For a second I got really excited to get home, like someone was there waiting to see it.

And then I remembered…

There wasn’t a man at home.

That thought lasted about two seconds before I laughed at myself.

Because the truth is, I’m not settling anymore.

The man who eventually walks into my life is going to have to keep up with the woman I’ve become.

And until then?

I’m perfectly capable of appreciating the view myself.

My Aveda Story

Shelby and I actually met when I returned to Aveda Institute in 2025 to complete my Advanced Esthetician license.

But my story with Aveda started long before that.

In 2008, I walked into Aveda for my first esthetics license. I was excited, hopeful, and ready to build a career in skincare.

Life had other plans.

In 2018, everything collapsed at once.

That was the year I lost my business, my home, and my car while taking care of my dying father.

When he passed away, reality hit fast. We were allowed to stay in his apartment for sixty days — just enough time for me to figure out what to do next.

At that point it wasn’t just me.

I had my son.

My younger brother.

My fiancé.

And my fiancé’s sons.

Six people needed a home while I had no job and no income.

Those sixty days were about survival — finding a place big enough for all of us and holding everything together the best I could.

Ironically, that was also when the state licensing rules changed, creating the Advanced Esthetician credential.

But when you’re scrambling to keep a roof over everyone’s head, taking a licensing exam is the last thing on your mind.

I wasn’t thinking about professional upgrades.

I was thinking about survival.

Years later, when life finally steadied enough for me to breathe again, I went back to finish what I started.

That’s when I returned to Aveda and met Shelby.

And eventually I walked across that stage again.

Not as the girl who first started in this industry.

But as the woman who had fought her way back to it.

The Moment That Made It All Worth It

When I got home from seeing Shelby, my son took one look at me and smiled.

Then he said something that completely stopped me.

“Mom, I’m proud of you for doing self-care and making yourself a priority. You deserve it. Shelby did really good with your face — you don’t look tired anymore. I can see your eyebrows and your top lashes.”

And just like that…

all those years of struggling suddenly made sense.

Because that kid watched all of it.

The chaos.

The rebuilding.

The nights when things felt impossible.

And he still grew up into someone who notices when his mom is finally taking care of herself.

That moment stayed with me the rest of the day.

The Weekly Shopping Adventure

My best friend — who I call “Mom” because she mothers me more than my own mother ever did — picked me up so we could do our weekly shopping trip.

Part of the reason she picked me up is because my Range Rover heater is currently blown, which basically means I’m driving a luxury freezer through a Minnesota winter.

So riding in her warm car sounded like a much better plan.

Before heading to Sam’s Club, we stopped at the shoe store.

I’ve worked my butt off for the last fifteen days straight — clients, long hours, rebuilding my business — so I decided to treat myself.

I walked out with a pair of Nikes and Converse, both on sale.

There’s another friend I spend time with who has amazing style. Sometimes I catch myself feeling a little self-conscious around them because I’ve never really cared about brand names or what’s considered “cool.”

They’ve never actually said anything to make me feel that way — it’s just something that pops up in my own head.

So finding a pair of shoes that felt a little closer to what they wear was weirdly exciting.

Not because I need to change who I am.

But because it felt good to meet myself halfway.

The Sam’s Club Symphony

Then we headed into Sam’s Club for cleaning supplies.

We were jamming out to the music, chatting away, laughing, and dancing through the aisles like we always do.

At one point I yelled out across the store,

“HEY MOM!”

Now here’s the funny part.

I’m actually older than her.

But she’s the one who has always stepped into that mother role in my life.

People looked at us like we were completely crazy.

And honestly?

They’re not wrong.

We are a little crazy.

But it’s the good kind of crazy.

The kind where you laugh loudly, dance in grocery stores, and stop caring what other people think — as long as you’re not hurting anyone else.

Life is too short to be serious all the time.

The K102 Surprise

Right in the middle of our Sam’s Club adventure, my phone buzzed.

It was a message from my brother.

Now usually when my brother texts, it’s something random or him asking if I’m busy so he can call me. Most of the time he just wants to ramble about something on his mind or needs help with something.

So I didn’t think much of it at first.

But when I opened the message, I had to read it twice.

He had just won Country Cruise tickets from K102.

And then he asked if I wanted to go with him.

That moment stopped me for a second.

Because over the years I’ve taken him to concerts whenever I could. It was always about making sure he got to experience things and enjoy life too.

So for him to turn around and invite me this time felt like one of those quiet full-circle moments.

Standing there in the middle of Sam’s Club, surrounded by carts, cleaning supplies, and our usual chaos, I just smiled.

Sometimes life has a funny way of reminding you that things really are starting to shift in the right direction.

The Pet Store ADHD Moment

Next stop was the pet store because Parker needed dog food.

Simple mission, right?

Walk in.

Grab dog food.

Leave.

Except that’s not how my brain works.

We somehow ended up standing there forever staring at the birds.

And then I met the soul cat.

You know the one.

The cat that looks at you like it’s ready to pack its bags, move into your house, and run your entire life.

For a solid minute I was like,

“Yep… this is my cat now.”

Then the ADHD moment kicked in.

Oh shit.

I’m not here to buy a cat.

I’m here to buy Parker dog food.

So we walked out of the store without the soul cat and with the actual reason we went in there.

Barely.

The Final Decree

Now the roast is in the crockpot.

The house is quiet.

And I’m sitting here doing something that used to feel impossible for most of my life…

Resting.

Not fixing anything.

Not running somewhere.

Not holding the whole world together.

Just sitting here, letting the day settle.

After a lifetime of rebuilding myself over and over again, today something finally clicked.

Today I realized something simple but powerful.

I’m finally living as the Sovereign Queen I fought my whole life to become.

And for the first time in a long time…

I’m actually enjoying it.

If your nervous system needs a place to exhale, I offer trauma-informed massage, head spa treatments, and advanced skin care at 888 Spa in Apple Valley, MN.