The Last Bin | Letting Go of the Final Pieces of 2018
I swear some days start out by choosing violence before your feet even hit the floor.
This morning started at 6:15 AM when I went to pick up Evan from work. I had actually gotten amazing sleep and was in a great mood. Parker and I got settled into the car and were ready to go when I realized my phone was still upstairs. So back upstairs I went.
Then, for the first time ever after living here for two years, I clipped the corner pole pulling out of my garage with my rear tire.
OK. I see how this day is gonna go.
About five miles down the road the wind was blowing through the window because it felt nice, my eyes got dry, and one of my contacts decided it no longer wanted to participate in today’s activities. So there I was at six-something in the morning pulled over on the side of the road trying to find a contact lens while Parker sat there watching me make questionable life choices.
Needless to say, by 6:33 AM I was home and ready to do my Glow Getter routine and morning vlog. Those are my non-negotiables. They happen every day no matter what. After that I decided this mom needed a reset, so Parker and I headed out for a hike.
The hike was amazing.
Parker has been really skittish again lately, but getting outside was exactly what both of us needed. After the hike I stopped for gas and decided to clean the car. Unfortunately I only had a dollar in change, so I got about half the vehicle vacuumed before time ran out. Half a clean car is still cleaner than a dirty car, so I called it a win. I wiped down as many muddy dog paw prints from the leather seats as I could and headed home.
Then I started purging.
Clothes.
Shoes.
And finally the very last bin I still had sitting around from Dad, Steve, and all the chaos of 2018.
And honestly, that’s where the day got heavy.
Part of me was already disappointed because a friend had said they were going to help me out today and didn’t follow through. It is what it is. People usually have good intentions. Life happens. Sometimes people choose themselves and what they need to do, and that’s OK.
But then I was standing there going through old stuff tied to people who are no longer here and throwing away clothes and shoes that no longer fit my life either.
It was one of those moments where you realize how much you’ve changed.
Not because someone told you.
Not because you were trying.
But because you’re standing there holding things that used to matter and realizing they don’t belong in your life anymore.
Needless to say, I got sad.
So I ordered tacos.
Honestly, tacos felt like the appropriate response to the situation.
I ate my tacos, put the Range Rover in the garage, and then decided I needed some type of distraction from my own brain. So I did a little plasma fibroblast work around my eyebrows and between my eyebrows.
Not because I was trying to fix anything.
I just needed something else to focus on for a little while.
And that’s pretty much how today went.
A clipped garage pole.
A runaway contact lens.
A hike with Parker.
Half a vacuumed car.
Tacos.
And finally letting go of the last bin from one of the hardest chapters of my life.
Weird shit.
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